I mentioned awhile back about how I was praying the Rosary on weekdays with a couple girls I met. Well, a couple weeks back, I saw a bunch of posters pinned up around campus about Rosary at 5:30 in the Kartuase church, with the intention of praying for the persecuted Christians in Syria - an issue that lies a little closer to home here than it does in America. The girls and I decided to just go to the 5:30 Rosary instead, since it was more "official" or whatever, and there would be more people.
Different people lead the Rosary every day, starting the beginning prayers, leading the first decade, and then finishing up. Once they finish the first decade, there is a pause for someone else in the church to pick up the next decade.
It's kinda funny, because sometimes there is a long pause before someone will just give in to the "peer pressure" and just lead the next decade. Of course, given the opportunity to be distracted by something, I run with it and have had fun chuckling to myself over who will give in first. I myself have never led a decade because...I dunno, "public speaking" or whatever just makes me really nervous, and that church is VERY echoey.
Anyhow, the point is that I enjoy other people being nervous when they feel "pressured" to lead, though I didn't dare do it myself.
So last night, I got in a couple minutes early (*polishes halo*) and was kneeling in a pew, when suddenly I felt someone leaning in to my pew to tell me something. I turn, and my philosophy teacher asks me if I'll lead the Rosary.
To him: "Um, sure."
To myself: "AGGHHHHHH!!! PUBLIC SPEAKING!!!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"
Then he told me to wait a couple minutes to give people a chance to trickle in.
Of course more people came that evening that any other previous evening.
Go figure.
Anyways, I could've used that time to calm down and give myself a pep talk ("C'mon Clare, you can do this! Your entire life has been preparing you for this moment! Just think of all those decades you've led at random churches and at home! You were BORN for this!") but mostly I just freaked out.
Like, how was I supposed to word the intention at the beginning? Most people said something along the lines of "We offer this Rosary up for the persecuted Christians in Syria", but what if they had changed the intention on me? What if we were now praying for seminarians, or persecuted Oliphants in Kalamazoo?!
What if I said it too fast (I talk extra fast when I'm panicked)?!
WHAT IF THE WHOLE WORLD CAME CRASHING DOWN BECAUSE I DIDN'T GET THE WORDING EXACTLY. RIGHT.
So those few minutes went really fast in my panic, but also really slowly, because I was unsure about how many minutes I was supposed to wait.
A "few" minutes?!
How much is a FEW minutes?!
1?
2?!
3 minutes and 24 seconds?!
AGHHHHHH.
When I decided that if I waited any longer, my teacher and everyone else would start throwing tomatoes at me, I just skipped the prayer intention all together and dove right into the Creed.
Aside from the panic about the prayer intention, things actually went pretty well - I managed to lead slowly, but not too slowly, and distinctly, but not too distinctly - it was juuuuuusstttt right.
Most people who lead end with the Hail Holy Queen, the "Let us pray: O God, whose..." and then invoke a couple saints. I, however, decided to get a little cray-cray and "added" the Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be for the pope at the end (to gain the indulgences)
As I was doing so, I was laughing rather maniacally to myself, thinking 'Professor MacNamara is probably thinking "Oh no, this one's gone haywire - she's adding extra prayers!! TAKE HER DOWN! GO GO GO!"' and then he and a bunch of other secret prayer agents that popped out of nowhere would jump over the pew and take me down while everyone else in the church panicked at my adding the extra prayers.
That didn't happen, fortunately, but anyways, I felt like a blog post was due and this is one of the more "significant" (i.e. something that I can add extra embellishment to to make more interesting) events that have occurred recently, so, there you are!
Strong work, Clare. Strong work.
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